The sun room in the old Colonial, bed and breakfast home was the perfect place for four couples to meet before heading out to dinner. A gifted decorator had come into the house and blended beautiful antiques with updated furniture and accessories. It exuded a fresh, comfortable look that encouraged conversation and laughter.

Out of the blue, my friend, April, announced that we should play a game, real or reproduction. I’m pretty sure that she made up the game.  Milton Bradley or Parker Brothers have no patent. She pointed to a table and asked the group, “Is this a real antique or a reproduction”? There was chatter back and forth, votes were tallied and I got down on hands and knees and looked under the table for a clue to the answer. I had to borrow a pair of reading glasses, which I wore over my contacts to read the tiny print. I solved the dilemma. Made in China. Other accessories and furniture were presented. With some there was no doubt to the answer. They were the real deal. The home had been used by the Yankees during the Civil War and many treasures in this home dated back before this period.

Knowing if an item is real or reproduced can be important. If one pays top dollar for a piece of art, a handbag or a scalper’s football ticket thinking they are authentic and finds out later they are fakes, fireworks can ensue. Reproductions can be great, but we want to know before we put our money down. No one likes to get ripped off.

Relationships are an area where we can be quick to declare what is real or fake. Life events can bring out different responses with different people. We read the newspaper about individuals that have heartbreaking events happen, some due to their own actions or sometimes not. The public can make quick evaluations. Are they sincere (real) or are they covering up (fake)? We think we have all the facts. A reductionist view of life can be easier and more comfortable. Putting people in boxes, with labels makes us feel more in control of our world. Is it black or white, good or bad, helpful or hurtful, real or reproduced? When we spend our energy evaluating others, we forget to look at ourselves.

This has been a big “Aha” for me these past months. If I spend my time and energy evaluating and making judgements on others and forget to look at myself, I look like a participant in a spin class. I am spinning in one place, but not moving forward. The fact is that there is enough work inside and outside of me to keep me busy as long as I am alive on this side of eternity. When my energy goes to figuring out others, then I go nowhere.

Real relationships are a treasure. If we feel that something is fake, we can feel ripped off. To know we can speak and listen and feel safe are qualities that we all desire with people we care for and love. I want to be aware to not call out on someone, real or fake, as if they were a piece of furniture. The good news is that God is redeeming and renewing us day by day as we trust in Him. He can makes all things new. There is flip side in God’s economy, there is real value in being a reproduction!

“Be made new in the attitude of your minds; and put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” Ephesians 4:23-24